My Journey So Far
After I had my myomectomy and uteroplasty (removal of myoma and reconstruction of damaged uterus) last 2010, I've always prayed for a baby. I've been very insecure since my surgery (I has a bikini cut c-section, by the way) but I was really thankful that Paolo stood by me and married me despite of the risk of getting pregnant. Luckily, the Lord immediately blessed us with a bundle of joy right after we got married. (It was the best wedding gift ever given to us).
Before I thought that pregnancy was easy, fun and beautiful. Don't get me wrong, feeling and knowing that a life thrives inside you is a wonderful feeling but I always thought that pregnancy was as easy as 1-2-3. Whenever I fantasize about getting pregnant, I thought it was all about the kicks, singing tunes to the baby inside the womb, touching and caressing your belly as you fall asleep (imagining that you look fabulously good as the ones in maternity photos). Well I was all wrong!
I never thought that there are so many hardships during prgenancy. In my case, I had so many challenges -- my frequent drowsiness and vomitting on my first trimester; my early contractions and placenta previa in my 2nd trimester; my unusual weight gain (from 110lbs to 140lbs-and counting), my acne breakout and lately, my horrible nightmares.
I've been anxious and depressed. Being told to stay at home for two months made me feel so useless and lonely. My bedrest period made me more anxious than ever -- what would happen to my baby? Will I still have a job when I get better? Is my husband still attracted to me? Those were the questions that kept running in my head. However, whenever I feel my baby's kicks and hear my husband's reassuring words, I feel relieved. Also, whenever other people remind me that all of the things I'm experiencing is normal, I get to realize that all these sacrifices are worth it.
I may still have my insecure, anxious and lonely moments, but I make sure that I keep myself positive for the baby. This is one gift that I will cherish for the rest of my life.
I hope you liked this post. I feel like I want to share with you my experiences so that expecting moms, or even single ones can learn or be inspired from this. Until next update!
Dress: From Cousin || Sandals: M. Nicole
Much Love,
The Bargain Doll
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